What is Surrogate Partner Therapy?
As a surrogate partner, I invest my mind, heart, body, experience and training, to provide safe experiences to help women overcome difficulties in emotional, physical and sexual intimacy. I work exclusively in a three-way relationship with a client who is concurrently in counseling with her psychologist, professional counselor, sex therapist, or clinical sexologist.
Surrogate Partner Therapy was introduced in the 1960s and 70s by famed sex therapy researchers William Masters and Virginia Johnson. Masters and Johnson produced extensive studies on human sexuality and the difficulties that some encounter in healthy function. They introduced the concept of enlisting trained surrogate partners to help clients work through their difficulties. Their techniques of gradually progressive structured exercises in breathing, relaxation, non-sexual and sexual contact were found effective in helping to resolve a wide variety of conditions. The interaction between the surrogate partner and the client has the added benefit of bringing to the surface the specific areas of difficulty so that they can be intentionally and safely addressed within the therapeutic team of the surrogate partner, the client, and the therapist.
SPT is supplemental to those in counseling who need experiential growth in addition to the valuable time spent verbally and mentally processing their concerns. Much like learning to ride a bicycle, we also need to physically experience riding to learn the complexities of pedaling, balancing and steering; to develop “muscle memory”; and to develop the confidence to get back up when we stumble. As a surrogate partner, I offer a supportive and guiding hand to help my clients progress towards more independent and confident performance.
What is not Surrogate Partner Therapy?
Surrogate Partner Therapy is not a form of prostitution. Our relationship is uniquely therapeutic in focus. My goal is not to produce “repeat customers” but rather to help free them to move on to other healthy and enjoyable relationships. Additionally, although many clients have challenges in sexual function, SPT may or may not include sexual contact depending on the client’s preferences, the condition being addressed, and the expected benefits as deemed by the surrogate partner and the client’s therapist.
Surrogate Partner Therapy is not a traditionally defined dating or romantic relationship. Although we may share very emotionally significant experiences and feelings, our relationship is defined in therapeutic intention and duration. I am blessed with a loving wife and beautiful family and my goal is to help my clients in their journey towards success in their own personal relationships.